New submission from rani

Hi,

My house maid is facing a problem. She is working in a house where there are four bachelor guys are staying. The problem is that one of the guys, purposely is very skimpily dressed when she is around (mostly in his underwear). He also hase exposed himself to her as though it was accidental. She does not know how to handle this. Any suggestions pls..

Thanks,
Rani

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3 Responses

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  1. Lisa Horn says:

    Hello Rani! I can’t provide the exact answer, but just reflections from where I live.
    Obviously a problem, as she(the housekeeper) is depending on this job for her living(ie doesn’t want to get fired).

    In the US, one may file “sexual harassment” charges against employers who do such things(for that is what this is), and any one fired in such a case can receive monetary remuneration(not sure if they can get “unemployment wages”).

    This is where unions come in too, at least in our country.

    I would think there might be some legal advice that could be given, at low cost, through a governmental agency?

    If not, perhaps it is time for housecleaners/housekeepers to organize. In larger groups, in unity, it is much less risky. It would still be a risk though. She has my empathy.

    And be aware of language too. In my country, a person who cleans house is called a “housekeeper”, or some such not gender specific term. “Maid” is an old term that allows men particularly to have “ownership delusions”, and we’ve all had enough of men’s fantasies causing life pain, if you get my meaning.

    Just some ideas, but of course, use own best judgement on actions taken. I know things are very different where you are, but in hearts and minds, we are the same : we want justice.

    Let us know how it all comes out. In solidarity, LH

  2. MS says:

    Invoke religion n social shame.

    “Saheb, mera marad bolta hai ki tum chaar mardon ke ghar mein kaam karne mat jao”.

    Ask her to always carry a shar object, scream loudly if she is scared and then blame it on a cockroach if everything is OK.

    We dont know what is status in society is – what his contacts are or which industry he works in.

    She should have a cellphone at all costs.

    Ask her to fake a conversation with a friend in which she says she has to go to the Police Station every week and that she now knows the cops well.

    Say her slum home has some rent issue, or landlord issue.

    Ask her to talk about how the Police are helpful.

    Ask her to leave early on some days on the pretext of going to the Police Station.

    If the man prays to a particlar God (Saibaba, Ganesha) then she can give prasad of those Gods to all 4 guys. The other guys will pressure him to stop behaving badly.

    Ask her to *NEVER* work when he is alone with her in the house.
    If she finds that he is alone or will be alone, immediately make an excuse and GET OUT OF THERE.

    Ask her to talk openly to the most sensible of them (hopefully one of them is).

    Depending on whether they will be scared of cops or not, if she knows a cop, she can ask him to come have a look either in uniform (he can call her out of the home to talk for some personal matter) or without – to ensure that in the event of a molestation (not rape) they can be put behind bars right away.

    Finally, if they are sons of powerful politicians, policemen, businessmen, then better leave the job.

    This is Delhi we are talking about.

    Set up a fund to get her a sweing machine, ask her to meet the nearest women’s Self Help group or NGO, or working women’s shelter and get a job there.

    she can also do cooking for a living – it brings a lot of money and people dont often rape women who get them food., somehow.

  3. Tera Murphy says:

    I think she should look for another job, and not tell him until she gets it. There are many hotels or other places that would hire her in Watertown. He may feel entitled, as it is his house and not hers. He may like that she is invisible. After she has a new job, she should tell him I don’t like seeing you naked, so I am quitting.

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