New submission from Devika Parashar
All my life, I’d only heard terrible stories about sexual and street harassment in Delhi and thanked my stars feeling a million times blessed to be living in a city much safer. The stories disturbed me, but I was assured that I’d never be confronted with anything of that kind since my presence in Delhi was restricted only to short family, house bound vacations. Well, I was wrong.
I was fourteen. I was visiting my aunts. We decided to go to the nearby shopping complex and I was unaware of the experience that awaited me. We decided to grab a quick bite at Mc Donalds. A tiny, crowded staircase led the way up to the eating area. I stood there with my tray when a man flashed by through the tiny space between me and the wall. His entire body brushed against my torso and I felt awkward, but I ignored it and took no note. The very next second, he came down the steps the same way and this time put forth his hands while running down. His hands ran over my entire torso. I stood there shell shocked. This time, I knew for sure that it wasn’t my overtly suspicious mind, but the truth. I stood there feeling violated and helpless. The people around me were too busy among themselves to notice anything that had happened. After a minute of shock, I decided to run after him. I ran down the steps, tray still in my hands, but was too late. He’d disappeared. It all happened so fast, I hadn’t even registered how he looked.
What that man did for a second of pleasure or whatever it is that makes men behave like absolute and complete animals left that fourteen year old angry with a bitter memory that can never be erased. This was the first time I was ‘eve teased’. It was the first time I’d encountered something like that and what I felt that day is something I can probably never be able to put correctly in words. Worse things happen and on a very regular basis. My story’s just one of the many-one of the many much much worse and disturbing ones. If this left me so bitter, I cannot even begin to imagine what girls go through when they are raped, stalked, groped regularly or harassed while they walk out on the street. And that is why Hollaback is important. That is why we need to bring about a change. We need to be supportive of each other and need to empathize and work with each other to bring about that change we’ve been craving so very desperately. It seems impossible maybe, but I am absolutely sure it isn’t something we can’t do. If you’ve read this, please put down your story/experience/opinion too. You have no idea what an inspiration one particular story or incident can be for somebody. Support this movement. We’re all working for each other. Street harassment must end. We need to feel safe when we go shopping or eating or dancing or movie watching or just to pick up our groceries or vegetables or when on a walk or going to work or college. It really is high time.
2 Responses
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Everyone talks about social mobilization today. The point is everyone knows there is harassment on the street, at home, on the bus etc. What measures is Hollaback going to take to end this? I hope this isn’t another movement that just talks.
Hey,
Thanks for writing in.
We are in fact a (another if you wish to use that word) movement that just talks (as of now). The chapter in Delhi is just gaining ground and is still in very primitive stages of progress so taking ‘measures’ is a future dream. That said, there are an unbelievable number of measures already in place to keep women safe, but there is no awareness, hence talking is one of the ways to circulate information.
However, coming back to the point of another movement that ‘talks’ you may be surprised to find that despite knowing that this ‘rape culture’ persists, not many people talk about it. We can’t limit the scope of our discussion to the erudite company we keep.
Discussions of street harassment or sexual harassment are marred by gender politics and with Hollaback what we are attempting to do is to get people to talk about it, to share experiences, to understand that being harassed is in no way their fault (many are conditioned into believing that they inadvertently attracted the attentions that are pressed upon them).
Critical gender discourse is unavailable to most, and is not well received by many more. In the absence of such information, we at Holla-back are merely attempting to deconstruct such ideas through shared experiences. Please remember that Hollaback is a web movement, so the very nature of our task is very different from that of an NGO’s.
I hope I’ve managed to address your question adequately!
Please do keep visiting/writing in!